The Go Green Campaign

It’s green and it’s hot. Maybelline New York, my altogether favourite cosmetic giant has come up with a new play thing for all makeup addicts like me. This thing called DEFINE - A - LASH mascara is for the woman who wishes for clump-free long lashes. By far, my personal favorites have been L’oreal Volume Shocking – which really gives you gigantic lashes and stays through the night, Chambor Curl Plus – that gives you extra big lashes coupled with waterproof effects, Estee Lauder Magnascopic – extremely desirable, comes in pocket sizes and makes your eyes look big subtle-ly. But this new green thing is no joke in the makeup department, its attractive and super-glam new. Priced at Rs 280, its so cheap and yet damn neat for a quick brush-up on a glam date. And oh, its waterproof too. Perfect for the upcoming monsoons.

Loving Sex Can Never Make you a Slut and Other Truths

This morning, there was absolute chaos in the house. Working out, making breakfast and generally bathing and getting ready for work without getting into each others way. A normal weekday routine that my husband and I have followed. There are cries from the bathroom for a towel, breakfast and dressing up- our multi-tasking home sport and switching channels and music according to whoever is walking past the player. And the moment we got out of home, we had the argument.

It all started with a book I was discussing called Full Frontal Feminism by Jessica Valenti of feministing.com. For all those who think that feminism means anti-men, you must read it. It’s not available in India yet but I got it as a gift from the USA, and it’s one of my most treasured books. Yes, there are places where it falters, bores you with American outlook towards life and even discusses hairy women and lesbians. But what’s best about it is the way you look at feminism today. In 2008, what’s the relevance of feminism?

We seem to be a generation that has everything. It’s like a reality TV Show, you enlist, try your best and regardless of where you come from, who your parents and what you have been doing till now, you’re the star! We are a generation that makes its own rules and are still looking for ways to bend them. Conforming makes you boring and rebelling is so out of fashion. In an age like this, what does feminism mean? My husband thinks feminism is just a name given to women who are anti-men, at least a good majority of them advocate men-bashing and shouting out “vagina” a million times. He thinks anyone treated inferior or fighting for the inferior should be a humanist. Because we are all born equal. I agree to disagree.

As a girl who worked real hard to get where I am, I know just what it is to be treated inferior. I come from a small town, its name totally oblivious even to well-versed geographics. My parents love me, treat me equally with my brother and all that, but what’s funny is that society puts them in a hard place sometimes. Hence between understanding me and working with society, their lines were blurred in any case. So despite being a rebellious kid who questioned why property was only given to boys and why I can’t go out at night just like my brother, I resigned to Journalism in my later years. And oh, did I just commit suicide by doing that? No, but my folks and my relatives thought so. This is hara-kiri at its best. Who will marry her? What can she be? What about timings and working late hours with boys? But well, I fought and made it. But yes, I do know what it feels like to be treated inferior, to getting close to none of my potential unrealized by getting married to a doctor or an engineer as most Andhra families love to. I also know what makes me what I am now, and why being a woman had its limits and how far is too far and how tight is too tight. Don't worry am not gonna kill you if you're stereotyping women and talk about prudes, shopping, jokes etc etc, I'm all for fun. Getting angry over dumb blonde jokes, that's not the feminism am talking about.

I’m sure other than just professional hazards, there’s a lot more to being a woman. Rape, Eve teasing, abuses, being treated inferior, unequal rights, unqual paychecks, stereotypes, Not giving rights to live life her way as an individual and the constant “This is how you should be as a woman”, thing! And oh, I forgot, No sex absolutely, you can’t enjoy it, talk about it or deal with it. That’s for bad girls. Lovely!

And as for eve teasing, I’m sure you’ve been groped in the lifts, in buses and trains and I’m sure you shut up because you did not want to create a fuss. It’s just lamely taken for granted that if you’re a woman you’ve got to deal with all this, its common, or better, don’t wear skirts, go out in the dark and don’t’ bloody drink. Cause drinking apparently makes you easy and then if you get raped, it’s not anyone’s fault but your own. So many pieces of advice, and so little time to kill of them who advocate shit like this.

I believe there is a reason why feminism came into our lives. And if humanism is what we should be aiming at, we earnestly have to get to be good feminists and work for what we as woman need, as they too first have to be relegated to the human section. In my thoughts, feminism is the path to humanism when it comes to dealing with women being treated as inferior sex. And hating men, that’s not my prerogative. Nor any real feminist’s agenda, but if you’re a man and you abuse me, rest assured I’ll hunt you down and kick your ass to Neverland. That goes for any man, woman, aunty and cow.

And feminists are real women with real problems; they want no groping, no nonsense, equal paychecks and more. They are not hairy and they could be lesbian and otherwise. And they love sex and work towards fulfilling relationships based on equality and mostly, they respect who you are for what you do and what you can be instead of abiding dirty stereotypes that society advocates. They own themselves and live with choices they thoughtfully make.

Humanism or Feminism? Take your pick ‘cause both tell you not to treat anyone inferior. Both tell you not take shit from anyone just because you’re you.

Make it c) All of the above.

Animal Instincts on Sale

This really impressed me. Amrapali, the designer jewellery brand, is really something. It’s fascinating that whenever I have gone to the store I have found really funky and unique designs. Amrapali always symbolized unique craftsmanship for me. Whether it’s a 500 buck pendant or a 5 grand necklace, it’s good to have one special something in your wardrobe from Amrapali. The new collection is a mix of gold and silver, a mix of matt and burnished, a mix of rough and smooth and a mix of precious and non-precious stones. Inspired by animal skin textures, forms, fish fins, bird feathers etc, the cuffs, earrings and bracelets are something you’ll never see anywhere else. Team them with a boho shift or a bandini dupatta and you’re done. Range is all price on request. Last year we saw Halle Berry, Nicole Kidman, Julianne Moore and even Brad Pitt sport some Amrapali. Save up for a signature piece now.

Addresses:

Amrapali, Phoolwari Cottage, Near Prithvi Theatre, Juhu Road, Mumbai. Tel: 2612 5001

Amrapali Jewels, 39, Khan Market, New Delhi. Ph: 51752025

P.S I miss Delhi so much. I want Khan Market and its pani puris, stationery, Puma Store, Good Earth and all those nice pet stores and cheap jewellery stores now!

Love, labels, lust, life, lingerie and more

Love’s like a runway but which one do I love more
No emotional baggage, just big bags filled with Dior

Love’s like a runway, so what’s all the fussing for
Let’s stop chasing them boys and shop some more

-Fergie

Things I loved about SATC:

The fashion. I mean, you can get away from every trouble and anxiety in life with fashion. No wonder its therapeutic in every way. And more so when you see the Oscar De La Rentas, the Bagborroworsteal.com’s exquisite Chanels or the Manolos in bright royal blue. Tears of fashion is a good feeling to have. It’s amazing how work stress, Relationship-stress and plain general stress refuses to give them any bad hair and wardrobe days. I guess after all, fantasy is thrilling than reality.

The friendship. The girlfriends and the heartbreak. It's so relatable especially if you’re away from friends, in a strange city, dealing with lows and highs and extinguishing all grief with one sugar free cappuchino from the nearby CCD. Which reminds me of my favourite saying, “Boys come and go, but girlfriends stay forever”. Here’s to all of my beautiful, wonderful pals who’ve made life more than just a rollercoaster ride.

The Happily Everafter. No matter what you are, no matter what you become and no matter how life goes, we all want that happy ending. And in our hearts, we know that we need love like a fish to water, we want to ride away into the sunset with the prince with a smile on our content faces. The glass slipper is where it all began. And where it will all end. Which also explains the shoe fetish that women have. Maybe it will be all that women are looking for, love and a pair of excellent dreamy shoes. I am a genius! I just explained a complicated theory on psychology and shoes.

Some labels are best left in the closet. So true. It tells me that labels are just there to tell you about the quality of workmanship and design-creativity and not here to add to your sense of self-worth. Self-worth comes from bigger things than just plain labels, it comes from being able to buy your own drinks and investing in real estate with your own hard earned money. And not to forget, handling breakups with the air of “fuck you, am fabulous”!

The obscure but really thought-provoking dialogues. For example, “Things happen only when you stop trying” or “You have tried to change yourself too much to suit the person you are with”. I heart nice dialogues. They become great subtexts for lessons in everyday life.

The biggest and best relationship as Samantha says is the one you have with yourself. And that's how life should be. No, am not advocating arrogance, selfish behaviour or eternal singledom. But to have a meaningful relationship with someone, you got to first tell yourself that you're really the best. You're fabulous and lovely, and if people have to be dragged to the altar to marry you then shove them away. And you gotta strive to keep your self-esteem intact. Afterall it's when you love yourself that you can love someone else.

Things I hated about SATC:

Product placement. I mean how much of a capitalistic onslaught can you take. They’re everywhere, the labels, the drama with a tinge of Vivienne Westwood and Vogue back to backs. Really! What do they take us for? A bunch of goldfish with the shortest memory span?

The drama. It’s true, its true, women love being drama queens but you could really cut us some slack. I mean, we cry sometimes but we don’t want to be forced to cry. You get it? A woman needs to know that heartbreak can be dealt with in a sensible, nice way and not by extensive copius tears thrown in for good measure just to show us some more Ralph Lauren bedsheets. No, I object! It’s like clichedom all over again.

The screenplay. It was long and unnecessarily inundated with weird sexual connotations. It ceased to be as carefree, comic and interesting as the series. It proceeded to make a mincemeat of every man, every wedding, every marriage and everything. I mean whatever happened to discretion. We like chick flicks but dumbing down just to get us to happily everafter in a contrived manner cannot be tolerated.

Big. I don’t want to see Carrie with a 50 above year old fat man who cannot commit to a sensible relationship and promise to stick to her forever. I mean, what does he have that he deserves so much? If the man can’t take you to the altar, your ideas of future are just different. And how can we deal or negotiate with that?

And I don’t care if the only label that matters is love and you want to wear a label-less gown but dude, you look terrible. It’s the single best moment of your life and you’re wearing label-less and ugly-looking stuff. How will your grandchildren feel?

The compromises. The excuses and the running after men. Somehow it made women look like they're willing to put up with anything just to get hooked. And you need not! You don't need to give excuses, feel for them, make compromises etc to land a man in your home. If you're 40 doesn't mean you're willing to die to get your man. Chill, they're other really handsome, good-in-bed fish who are willing to do anything just to 'be' with you 'forever'.

Whether it’s Charlottes smile and figure while she’s gymming in Mexico or Carrie’s toned arms while carrying shopping bags home, why does 40 mean having to choose between fat and ugly or bald and paunchy? Here are four women who are successful, hot and have good taste and all they get is hideous and one foot in the grave men? And no, one cannot propose with a Manolo diamante, you need a real diamond ring, you idiot.

And Carrie, I liked Aidan more than Big. He was a nice guy, loved you, followed protocol and was willing to do anything for you. And no, he was handsome, non-gay, non-metrosexual and not a wuss. So, why is it hard for you to have him? Does Big signify everything thats unreachable? does Big represent everything you wanted and could never get? Is that why you want him, just beacuse he's unavailable?

Hungry thoughts?

Why is it that we have heartbreaks and insecurities if we have Jimmy Choos and LV bags? No, I believe money is not enough, but it can sure buy you a holiday in Mexico and help you tackle unhappiness with opaque tights by Chanel? Innit?

Why should the mention of "marriage" rake in so much fuss? Why should we drag a man hook, line and sinker to make him yours forever? Why should we reassure a man so much to marry us, why should we convince him so much that we're worth the dough? I have married someone who did not make a big fuss about it. He just thought he wanted to be with me and if marrying is the way to do it, then so be it. So, there are others who want to marry and live with you wholeheartedly. So why do we always choose the ones on the other side? Is saying "marriage is bullshit, the new fashion fad?

That’s about it I guess.

Fantastic and Fabuloso,

Me

Wishful Pinking

It's not everyday you get labeled a dumb blonde. That too in India. But I have been there, been called that. No, not because I don't understand who the UPA and the NDA are. Not even because I can't place where Nandigram is. It wasn't even because I can't live it up in striped pants and a matching black shirt with a logo on the pocket.

It was just my pink nail polish. It must have been called "Rose Mist" or "Fuchsia Fantasy" or some such. You must understand that with the number of cosmetics I deal with on a daily basis, I usually do tend to forget the fine print at the back label. Coming back to my pink nail polish, all it got me was bad press. So what keeps this bright attractive traffic stopping colour on the judgmental pedestal? What makes it so unintelligent that one look at it on my twiddling thumbs and you mark my examination copies in binaries?

Some say it speaks of frivolity, some casually rub their hands in glee cause its nothing but a sign that am somehow not eligible for a masters degree. All I can tell the super intellectual stuffing is that it takes more than a colour to just mark your character. It takes more than nail polish and lipstick to push your point and make a difference. And what’s more, in the same way, a little lipstick and looking good while at it, can never hurt. It actually makes your personality more colourful and your mind is open to a lot more possibilities. If you think you’re too serious to bother about what you wear and how you keep yourself, then you’ll on the road yet again to finding nirvana in black. And you’re definitely monochrome, one-dimensional and boring. All because you didn’t try some pink nail polish. Trust me!

Anyways, I have decided to work on what I do best- fashion, beauty, boots, patent leather, books, creative things, inspiration and home décor on this blog. And pink is just the beginning. And pink is more than just my signature colour. Pink is what I am when I’m tickled with creativity, and pink is where I go to when I’m desperate for therapy. Pink was a regular song of mine till I hit mid twenties and it was aerosmith who understood that obsession very well. The man in my life only comes as close as Pink Floyd, but he understands pink is my passion. Pink is pizzazz, in my world.

I heard this somewhere. It says “I cannot control how I am perceived, I can only control how I am presented,” so here we are.

Fabuloso Honey, let’s get started then.